How can I tell that I'm actually appreciated?

for now, its homework, homework, homework. blogging is boring. I've got nothing to talk to this dead computer, ! I mean, I'd rather talk in person, but sometimes talking to the computer really helps as the person might become egotistic.. *refers to* *some peeps* but YOUTUBE isn't ! its like the only website I go to now, the most. It helps, OK? REALLY! ITS THE BEST IN THE WholeWideWorld! sad, sad, sad loner.... This week was real brilliant. got squashed by homework, got squashed by friends. wasted some time for utter sympathy and need and compassion or for company. next to get squashed by -? sigh... something that really restricts what I've got to say is the other party's way of thinking. I mean, if you start with a sentence "You know, all along I wasn't the person you'd thought I was.." and bla bla bla, they might start thinking "WHATT??!! Really??" God, I've got issues. =X I've thought of a better life when I leave this school.. but first I've gotta pass chinese, really. that stupid obstacle! and I've gotta think up something for an audition! and I've got to get A's for everything else! why are standards so high, huh? But another part of me says, you've gotta do it, or you're gonna end up nowhere. YEAH, STOP DREAMING, MAN! GET A (virtual?) LIFE !